I have always heard that saying, “God does not give more than you can bear”.
Today I feel my spirit is breaking.
It feels as if the light has gone out and I stand alone in the dark hoping that someone would pull me out as I broke my back trying to climb the endless climb which begins with a step and ends with the step.
I have been trying. I have been trying my soul and my mind and every ounce of energy in me, to get out. To go. And leave. For good.
Distant words ring in my mind that I need to get away. And I have been trying so I can get lost in the crowd and yet here I stand. Hoping. Fool, you are that you hope.
Hope is a poison that eats away your self.
The kind of self that sacrifices itself happily at the altar of disgrace.