One Afternoon 

It’s funny that I remember this day 

It was something which triggered the thought I carry in my mind since this afternoon 

I can just type and you can read it and know if you wish what I feel. 

Propping up my feet on the adjacent chair, I stare at the ceiling 

My nose is blocked due to the cold triggered by the unruly Delhi weather. 

I can’t breathe properly so my breathing is laboured 

And I concentrate on one, and then the next and the next. 

Till someone asked me if I was okay 

I was okay. Sure. 

In normal terms, as anyone would say 

But I was drowning, if anyone could see, see for what I really was

A drowning creature in a poisoned water lake 

I feel the pain in the centre of my chest 

With every breath I take and hope the next one will not hurt. 

I say I am okay because I know I won’t be able to explain in acceptable words what’s wrong with me 

Why am I not happy? 

I have thoughts which scare people for they live in denial and I think I know what we are facing 

What everyone knows and yet doesn’t want to know. 

I know it, I think, and so I despair for us all. 

It’s been a long day, it’s been a long life. 

I close my eyes, I hope to tell my tale 

Someday to someone who understands how I feel. 


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