“Close your eyes and pretend it’s all a bad dream. That’s how I get by.” – Jack Sparrow
I wonder if anyone even reads my blog. I really doubt it. Only a handful of people read it sometimes, I guess.
My writing is a total flop, I know! But I cant help it.
Slipping away with every tick of the clock
My peace, my hope of survival
Disappearing fast from my heart
Leaving behind a cold vacancy
Dread creeps in from my spine
And filters into my heart
Grasping every nerve with its deathly grip
My screams die in my throat
As I freeze there
Nothing left, not one ounce of hope in me
Hazy and shocked, I can barely see
Losing myself, my heart is now a stone
A hollow stone filled with dread
Of losing, of gaining
Of hearing, of saying
Of dying, of living.
I look at his picture
A tender and kind face
My heart melts at it
Twisting into agony
At his absense.
My first Blank page.
After school, standing alone
Walking alone, out of the gate
Pained to see what I dont have
Longing for it, my heart wails in vain
My second Blank page.
Coming home to a lonely mother
A rebel of a brother
Silence reigns, forever remains
I stare with a dread so deep
Rips my heart as I collapse and weep
My third Blank page.
The holes I see, the gaps I feel
No one knows what air I breathe
A blank diary with faded white
Crinkly and fading fast
As dust to dust it goes around
My blank pages keep turning along.
I look up at the starry night
As I have a wish to make
I close my eyes and raise my arms
To begin my wish with hope in my heart
There is no existence without you
Dont leave me as I will die
Its easier if I tell you this
Dont waste my life in tears and sighs
Dont die for I will fall
Dont die for I will cry
Please dont die for I will be lost
To those who hurt me
My wish is my hope to live
I strive, I hold on and I stand
Pinning my hopes to your strength
For you are all I ask for
Dont die even if they reject you
Dont fall even if they push you
Dont lose yourself even if they take away your flame
You are mine forever
I wont die as I have you
For every me, there is a you
This is my wish for which I live
Hoping to reep for all that I give
Looking at her dad
Eyes filled with expectations
Longing for her father to look back
To say that he loves her
To hold her in his arms
To cherish the moments they share
But he never did
She waited and kept on waiting
While she lived like a servant in her own home
Her brother went to a place called “school”
But she was not allowed to go out
Cooped up in her home
She ached for the open ground
The feel of dew as she would walk on the grass
The morning breeze caressing her
The night bringing solace
Sadly, she never saw it
Years later, she was adorned with jewels so rare
Oh how she squealed with delight
Felt that her father had finally noticed her
As she went to him
All dressed and proud
She was handed over to someone else
She didnt understand
She had done nothing wrong
But daddy was sending her away!
As the realisation dawned
She writhed and screamed
Consumed by her rage
All it took was a slap across her face
Silencing her for her lifetime
Whisked away to a stranger’s place
To die, to hide, to waste
People love rain. They say rainy season is the season of romance. They join so many cheezy words to it. Raindrops falling from the sky and hitting the ground, replenishing the ground water resources. I agree it is benificial. No doubt people find the sound of raindrops falling as soothing. Some people love to drink coffee or tea when its raining. Thats where the drama kicks in. They see it in movies and think it is true. Sitting on the window sill, with a cup of tea/coffee in hand and a sad expression on the face. They think its romantic. Hahaha. Well its not!! From my point of view, they are wallowing in self pity. Tut tut. All that is irrelevant.
Anyways, as you must know, I dont like rain and the package it brings with itself. All the wetness, the dampness, the dirt, all the mud and puddles on the roads, the sound of raindrops hitting the cemented floor. Urgh!
Its like that ticking bomb which only ticks and never sets off! Its like that alarm clock without a snooze or dismiss option. Its like the most annoying sound ever.
Sigh. Still, its good for us. It replenishes the ground water resources. It brings relief during hot summer days and all. But it is not enough for me to like it.
I just dont like it. Thats it. I dont like rain. It reminds me of that poem:
Rain, rain, go away
Come again another day
That was one of my favourites.
Its raining here by the way.
#saddest face in history